I choose to become an Amazon

Here’s the decision, with all the technical terms for those who are technically inclined: Mastectomy with Sentinal Node Excision. No reconstruction. None of my docs expect that I will need radiation with this course of action. Chemo is clearly not needed. (Sorry, Tiim, I won’t get that “totally hot bald chick” look).

“It’s a personal decision”, a truism that I zapped past in the first hundred times I encountered it on this path. Wow. It’s really true, at this crossroad especially. Different women make different AND COMPLETELY LEGIT choices at this intersection. I have chosen this road after sorting through data, talking to women who have had mastectomies, consulting with four docs from different disciplines, and of course listening to what is true for me, for my higher power, for James. This direction made the most sense to me initially and continues to after my best attempts to be a skeptic.

Surgery will be 8:45 – 11:45 am June 4 at Swedish Hospital, under the baton of Dr. Claire Buchanan. I’ll spend the night, then take the four block ride home. Robin, my sister will be here that night, from Louisville. Wow. I’ll ask David B, my Blog alter-ego, to make a posting that night. He asks “Have you chosen your bow yet?”

I’ll make a posting later, with requests for those of you who are inclined toward the spiritual stuff.

Shoot straight.

Diagnosis & Treatment Options

Well, it’s happened. That moment from bad made-for-tv movies, from other people’s lives, from moments of borrowed despair when one thinks, “There’s something wrong. Oh my, what if I have cancer?” But you don’t.

Well, in this case, I do. Some cells in my left breast have gone awry not once, but twice. The first time was in 2007, when calcifications (small areas of dead cells that show up as dots on a mammogram) revealed abnormal cells. A lumpectomy removed a very small mass of Ductal Carcinoma in Situ, DCIS, what is termed a Stage 0 cancer. DCIS evolves into cancer in 5-18% of people. I was placed on a 6 month follow up regime. In March of this year I began to have a lot of discomfort in the area of the incision. Back for follow-up, including an MRI which my naturopath’s office heroically won through an hour of phone calls to the insurance company. The MRI revealed a suspicious mass in a different quadrant of the same breast which had previously harbored abnormalities.

Harboring. It sounds romantic, right? Harboring fugitives like Casablanca or Harriet Tubman. Nope. These are rowdy guests that come to visit and never want to go away, never follow the normal life cycle of a cell, a peaceful death. Instead they want immortality, a constant party, a mosh pit of jostling stimulation. They spill out of the apartment and into the hall: invasive ductal carcinoma (the most common kind of breast cancer). The work of the moment is escorting these bad boys out of the building and cleaning up after their party.

There is good news here: it was caught very very early. The MRI estimates the tumor is 7-8 mm. The biopsy showed it to be low grade, 4.5 on Bloom Richardson Scale (which goes from 3-9). It’s slow growing, not aggressive, and 98% hormone receptive, which makes me a candidate for lots of treatment options.

More blessings: if we’d not been following up on the DCIS, in all likeliness, this would not have been found until it was Stage 2 or 3. I have a team already assembled from 2007 – surgeon, oncologist, naturopathic support, massage therapist, counselor, and prayer warriors. I live blocks away from some of the best cancer treatment in the world. (I mean, who else do you know who has experienced a magnetically guided vacuum biopsy? Isn’t that a line from Star Trek?) And I have tremendous support – from my husband James, family, friends, and work.

At this point I’m considering two options for courses of treatment: lumpectomy with radiation or mastectomy. Next week I see a radiation oncologist, hear his recommendations, and will make a choice. Both options have been vetted by my surgeon and the cancer naturopath, who is tops in the country. Surgery is scheduled for the morning of June 4.

Some of you have asked what I may need. Thanks! To some extent, I don’t know yet. Much of my task now is tapping the energy it takes to participate in the process, to be willing to do what it takes to heal. That means plenty of rest, sunshine, balance and good food. Here are a few ideas:

• Think a good thought. If you know me, you know that I find power in prayer, meditation and touch. Send images of strength and love to me, perhaps reaching your hand to touch my left shoulder or arm.


• Cruciferous vegetable recipes! This family of veggies is presided over by grandmother cabbage and also includes brother broccoli, cousins kale and cauliflower. They are legendary for their ability to strengthen the immune system and block growth of cancers. Since 2007 I’ve aimed to eat two servings a day, but now it’s ideal if I increase that. There’s only so much coleslaw a gal can eat, so please post your favorite recipes. Cooking healthfully has been a great place to put my energy.


• Fun. I may call you up to hear a cheerful voice. Or send me silliness. Nothing political please! Just sheer play.


• Patience. I treasure hearing from you, and may not always have the wherewithall to respond.


• Save the Pink Ribbons for another occasion. The pink ribbon movement is great, but I've never cared for the color, so send them to someone who will appreciate them!

I’ll try to get postings up here to keep you in the loop, assisted by some of my A team supporters.

Aside from this, life is good & I’m healthy. James & I spent a week cross-country skiing in February. In March I premiered a new piece about Emma Darwin. I bike all around town. This is simply one more part of that imperfect beauty – life.